I want to talk about Improv.
I love Improv. LOVE IT. And it is not the creating part that is exciting. There will be times where you forget everything you've trained your human mind about attempting to CONTROL a situation, and simply slip into The Super-Conscious and allow yourself to purely and gently REACT. And I'm talking micromoments within micromoments. Not trying to land a joke, not judging yourself, a mistake and misstep become opportunity. Pure unadulterated acceptance and love and simply allowing yourself to exist in the live-stream current of the Now.
It is what I imagine religious people must feel about God. And that is certainly a powerful drug.
I am very good at two particular things. The first is being stuck in my head, fixated on an outcome or particular timeline that could potentially exist from current circumstance; this will involve glazed vision, softened breathing and a 1000-mile stare which is essentially a momentary attempt at psychological transcendence, where I'm sure at some level my nervous system is excellent at replicating and inducing response from imaginary stimuli. It is a temporary mental damming by a very excellent problem solving tool; the human brain.
The second is being present. Like white-hot, laser-sight, catch-a-bullet-in-your-teeth, Miyagi fly-catching awareness.
And here's the interesting thing. Let's say: you are swimming in river rapids, violent water thundering all around you, the current drumming you downstream. If you attempt to swim AGAINST the current, take control of the situation... you are not going to have a very fun time. It's going to suck mega balls. That river is going to fight you every step of the way to shore. And it is going to roar at you. And that river is going to be incredibly intimidating, fiercely strong and without respite.
I mean, it probably is regardless, right?
But let's say you let go trying to get back upstream, to where you were, where you were safe at the campsite. You embrace your surroundings, and let your body flow with the current. I'm pretty sure that river will suddenly not be as violent. Infact, if you were to not notice (nor care) of the passing shoreline, forget it completely, suddenly those raging rapids become quite still. And calm. Because when the shore of where we THINK we need to be, or get to, vanishes...
Hey, you're just enjoying the swim.
Ego gets in the way. The construct of Self gets in the way. Fear, Hatred, Contempt are all born from resistance. Struggling to get back to shore.
I write this because tonight I got to perform Improv, connect myself into a communal energy, and have the sheer PLEASURE to remind myself of that often underestimated phrase: Go. With. The. Flow.
And I don't mean the "Well, we've been in a relationship this long, may as well ride it out" flow. I mean listening to your vibrational being and following the river to the harmonious waters of your soul where you can bathe in the gleaming golden hum of truth without falsity, politeness or pretentiousness. #thisshitjustgotnextleveldeepyo
In simpler words: Follow your pleasure.
I Love Improv.